Back at once

Dear St Jon Darling,

Hello love, it has been two months since you left me, time flies baby. I’m missing you badly. But I’m in good shape. I’m eating well and drinking less as you always wanted me to do. You know what I mean right, baby. I’m always your good girl.

Today’s magical. People around me are acting a little weird. Ohhh, in fact they are too good to be true. My Professors are so angelic and I think I might fall in love with them. Sorry sayang. When I was in the subway sniffing and hoping somebody would spare me some tissues, TADA I got it!! A sweet little old man noticed and handed me some. Hence I was having a big grin on my face the whole day! Everything seems a little extraordinary today.

I somehow feel that whatever good that has happened to me came from you. It’s like a reminder that you are always here. Did I tell you its magical?

Oh yeah baby, do you remember PS I Love You? The movie I always wanted to watch but never did? Probably it was meant to be. I watched it yesterday!

Though you’re no long one call away, but I’ll continue to use this to reach you. Yes THIS.

I was in Berlin over the weekend. Well, like you said, it’s filled blocks with lots of walking creatures in it. Just like every another German cities plus more Asians.

The only thing I really love about the city is the TRABBI and Ampelmännchen. They are extremely cute!

This definitely reminds me of you!

Your all-time favorite top.

I MISS YOU dear!

I’ll be heading back to Köln this coming weekend. To be honest, I’m afraid. You’ve got to help me alright? Give me the strength to look up to the Kölner Dom and cope with the promise that will never be fulfilled.

I Sayang You!

A Time for Everything

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under heaven:
a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,

a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,

a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,

a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain,

a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,

a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,

a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace


I somehow enjoy reading the book of Ecclesiastes, especially this chapter.

But don’t get me wrong, if you have any doubts or qualms about the bible, I will be the last person you would seek advise for.

I wasn’t brought up in a christian family and i knew very little about faith until i was in my teenage years when `Heaven´ came into the picture and being questioned.

After years of spiritual development, discovery and practice, i still have my doubts on certain things in the bible.

Is the TRUTH behind the stories is what i’m searching for?

Or believing what i choose to believe is the answer?

I read this chapter over and over again during my darkest hour.

I even read it to Jonathan in the ICU, on the phone and during his very last moment in the hospital.

It came as a complete surprise when the pastor recited these verses during his service.

Ultimately i knew at that point, He is the answer to my question.

He answers.