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making a change

dear baby,

i’m completely baffled by my how-to-utilize-my-two-months-summer-break right now.

i want to do so much in such a little given time space. no, i refuse to spend the two months lavishing on oh-so-orgasmic-food, sand-sun-sea, and parties and overflowed tlc though i know that’s what you’d most probably suggest me to do. i need something solid and sustainable in my life. the feel of my very own insignificant existence and presence in this place call earth. i want to put my shoes in all walks of life. i want to feel their simple but yet fulfilling being. i want put a test on my patience on handling and seeing unfamiliar conditions and situations. i want to get out of my comfort zone and face with real hardships and sufferings. i want to be used as a tool to reach out. with my best ability, i want to bring light and laughter into people’s lives and enlighten them that their happiness and comfort matters to me. i’m torn between two choices, the children i love most and the mother earth i belong to. both are equally valuable and crying for my attention. how do i prioritise? where do I start? india? bangladesh? cambodia? indonesia? vietnam? thailand? which project should i head for? can i deal it alone? what can i offer? how much can i give back?

The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man.
George Bernard Shaw
Irish dramatist & socialist (1856 – 1950)