Here’s my penny of thought.

Now that I’m in 3rd year of University, I’m starting to get a bigger picture of everything – speaking of my field of interest, how I perceive my future and ideal job and etc. Well, theoretically I’m supposed to be all bucked up and equipped with know-how and all ready to march into the world and shine!

The fact that it is NOT doesn’t seem to bother me. In fact, that doesn’t sound so right.

It is clearly because I’m not ready. I’m not a superwoman or rather have an IQ of over 180. Look at the pace of our society – the chase, the faster, the greater, the bigger, the smarter, and the richer, more, more and more – a superlative civilization.

And truth to be told, I despise the inventor of the Intelligence-Quotient, unremarkably a German guy.

Is humankind purely base on grading?

Do we need to put a tag on everything to prove our ability and insecurity?

It is all about proving to other people and satisfying our own needs in order to assure them and ourselves what we’ve really got in us?

Who are you to tell me I’m not as bright as my neighbor? Who are you to forfeit and judge my credibility? By flashing me the 3 digits of an IQ Test which is carried out by human itself tells me where I stand among the sea of people?

So what’s there to measure next besides everything?

My point is that one’s well-being is directly correlated to emotions and feelings.

I’m not sure if I’m being exposed far too long in a developed and disciplined society, in a culture of a high living standard where people compete and work their ass off to make their lives lazier. You know, like ha-ha loser, I could afford a dish washer, I save time, maintain my flawless hands and pay more bills on water and electricity.

Think again about the whole point of wanting to make our lives more comfortable. We end up giving up more precious things while chasing the comfort zone. We create problems for ourselves and fall into believing that by having such things, life could be better. And we complain at the end of the month that the bank account is empty. Misery starts and stress mounting.

PS : I don’t know where is this heading. But I just reread what I’ve written, and I realized that probably the only reason why is it ever written is because I’m currently intoxicated. I’m under a lot of doping substances and its side effects are enough to make me bald. So pardon me!


Dear Enoch,

You were there for him and me during our darkest time. You supported, listened and cared for us when we most needed. Today that uncle has left to a better place and to be with Him and him, to a place with eternal joy, blessings and happiness.

When someone we love dies, God hides a smile in every memory and hope in every tear.

With much love…

After a great tragedy, Lord, it’s so hard to know how to reach out to those who are grieving. What can I say to parent who losses a child? How can I comfort someone who has lost a parent? The grief of such losses seems greater than we can bear. Yet I know just crying with those who cry is one way to share their burden. Thank you for healing tears, Lord. May they flow freely and turn quickly into the joy that you promise will come. Help me to see with new eyes today, especially the burden of care that others harbor within them. Grant me insight to see beyond smiling faces into hearts that hurt. When I recognize the pain, let me reach out, Lord.


Okay. I know what you are thinking here. It is not the Malaysian Dream Girl.

To be honest, I’m pretty dazed recently. Since the start of my autumn semester, things appear to be more complicated. Well, generally everything seems to be more complex. I started to shower myself with matters more than I could absorb.
I’m running around for interviews and sending off zillions of internship applications to all over the world; looking around for voluntary services around the neighborhood even though I don’t have the time to care for my homework; attending extra lectures, doing a research project, and currently got assigned to a project to investigate the feasibility of a solar power plant in India by a company which might not even hire me as their intern. Weekends are usually filled with meet ups, birthdays and hangovers.

I’m heated in lectures and I feel left out in studies.

I have to admit; I’m completely washed out and lost.

For once, I want a getaway. Bury myself in a hole and be vanished.

Free as a bird, into the wild and never be seen. Into my picture perfect world, where everyone loves everybody, where nature reigns and love conquers.

Just when we realize at times like this, when our hormone boils, our need for mommy goes sky high, and our cry for attention rockets to its crest…AHA! And just about when we almost miss and lose the whole point and sense of everything and anything, somehow or rather… we accidentally find them back again. Well, funny but true.

It’s mad. It’s a state of mind. It’s an art of being.

We need to be lost to be found.

And I found MDG.

MDG is a global partnership targets to eradicate poverty established during UN Millennium Declaration on 2000.

These goals are born for reasons. 10 years have passed and we have 5 more years to achieve our targets.

Let me stress: OUR targets. Not his, hers, theirs but our targets.

I stumble upon this initiative as I’m doing my papers research. It’s like a wakeup call. You feel as though you’re part of something, even it might be little.

The impact which reminds you that someone needs you. Hang in there!

It brings you back to the smiles!


The Millennium Development Goals

Eradicate extreme poverty and hunger
• Reduce by half the proportion of people living on less than a dollar a day
• Reduce by half the proportion of people who suffer from hunger
Achieve universal primary education
• Ensure that all boys and girls complete a full course of primary schooling
Promote gender equality and empower women
• Eliminate gender disparity in primary and secondary education preferably by 2005, and at all
levels by 2015
Reduce child mortality
• Reduce by two thirds the mortality rate among children under five
Improve maternal health
• Reduce by three quarters the maternal mortality ratio
Combat HIV/AIDS, malaria and other diseases
• Halt and begin to reverse the spread of HIV/AIDS;
• Halt and begin to reverse the incidence of malaria and other major diseases
Ensure environmental sustainability
• Integrate the principles of sustainable development into country policies and programmes;
Reverse loss of environmental resources
• Reduce by half the proportion of people without sustainable access to safe drinking water;
• Achieve significant improvement in lives of at least 100 million slum dwellers, by 2020
Develop a global partnership for development
A number of objectives, including:
• Address the special needs of landlocked and Small Island Developing States
• In cooperation with the developing countries, develop decent and productive work for youth
• In cooperation with the private sector, make available the benefits of new technologies especially
information and communications technologies

chin chin & muck muck

This song got me smiling, smiling and smiling, the whole night long.
It defines my feelings right now.
Funny, confused, mysterious, lost, happy, empty.
Thanks to Tim.
I love my housemates!
What will be will be.