Truth to be told, I’ve been out of the battlefield, ohhhhh I mean the war game of ❤ for quite some time now. Relationships are tough stuffs. As much as I love to deny, it’s not always a bed of roses. It takes a lot of effort and patience. Say, just like watching our plants grow! It needs the right amount of ingredients and recipe! The sunlight alone obviously isn’t enough; you need water, a tad of fertilizer, and a little bit of love! And the results, TADA it flowers!
So, this whole concept of two people liking, adoring, admiring, LOVING or whatever we like to define it needs A LOT of compromise and trust. This feeling between two people hoping to love and expecting to be loved can be very strenuous at times. We don’t know what to expect, we practically throw ourselves out there risking being hurt or trusting that person not to hurt us or hoping that person will love us back. And when it is not the case a) we can break down, tear ourselves up and blame the whole world for our misfortune or b) HAHA..don’t fret, buck up and move on!
Magazines, books, movies and websites with a handful of “How to get/lose a guy in 10 days”, “10 signs that he’s not into you anymore”, “10 signs you are completely and totally over him” and list of do’s and don’ts are all rubbish! The fact that people are buying these ideas is unfathomable. In fact, they are the evidence of the EFFORT that one puts into a relationship, ohhhh yeah by reading those useful advises will completely fix your relationship. These given formulas and guides are theoretically proven by a bunch of experts who are having and enjoying their wonderful and perfect relationships!
So yes, there’s no way out. Human beings are complicated because we choose to be! It’s just a trial and error. Sometimes you win sometimes you lose. It’s a gamble!
Bear in mind that relationships are essential to make us whole but it does not mean that our partner is responsible for our happiness! Of course, we care and love our partner; we want to see and make them happy, we protect them and give the best we could offer. By doing so, we always tend to focus on ways and ideas to please them, and it becomes a habit. We sacrifice in order to make them happy but end up hurting or upsetting ourselves. When we realize that we are no longer happy, we want a way out! This expectation of pleasing our partner has a higher price to pay. It takes more than that to survive a relationship!
The different needs and longing that each and every one of us has can’t be fulfilled by our partners. It lies in us. We are in charge of our own happiness. Hence, do not expect our partner to think or react the way we want them to.
And personally, I think that’s the best part in a relationship! Imagine having two very different personalities and characters are attracted to each other. That’s what I call LOVE. Unconditionally. You are just you! We say what we mean and we do what we say! Just being ourselves without trying so hard to please one another. Only when we are able to love ourselves, we are capable of loving others!
PS : I miss you baby!