‘I receive your love and I give you mine.
“Not the love of a man for a woman, not the love of a father for a child, not the love of God for his creatures.
“But a love with no name and no explanation
‘Like a river that cannot explain why it follows a particular course, but simply flows onwards.

‘A love that asks for nothing and gives nothing in return; it is simply there.

Aleph – Paulo Coelho

Girls Like You

Be careful what you wish for, you just might get it.

I love walking in the rain.

Be wet.

Be free.

Be there.

Be with nature’s laughter and tears of joy.

I love doing yoga and meditation. I love chanting OHHHHHMMMMMM towards the end of every lesson.

I love sailing and learning to sail. I love learning to tie all sorts of knots. I love not knowing where the wind comes and simply drift me away.

I love letting in as much atmosphere as I can.

I love being me and with me.

I am.

Be me.

Be kind.

Be brave.

Be love.

Be cosmic.

I am.

Anything we write after I am is simply a concept.

I decide what I am.

I define me.

I am thankful.

I am alive.

I am happy.

I am a vegan.

I am a minimalist.

I am.

I’m enjoying unveiling THIS mystery. I’m enjoying the fact that NOBODY, absolutely NOBODY can write the future.

No control issue here. Purely swimming along and waiting for THIS treasure to emerge.

Screw security and certainity. Screw goals and plans.



Did I mention that his performance was orgasmic!

It was so intensive that I got really emotional and overwhelmed.

Just him and his guitar, completely washed me way.

Great music is like a deliverance, it brings us to the zone and carry us into a trance state, where our mind and soul is purified.


Noah and the Whale for my Birthday!

Thank you for your music!

White Feather

I found it! It’s a sign!

Never stop believing.

I cut myself, got disheartened and am clinging to the edge of hope but I know along the way, they are feeding my soul and building me into the person I’m for today, tomorrow and eternally!

the noblest thing a human being can experience is acceptance of the mystery

The Warrior of Light sometimes behaves like water, flowing around the obstacles he encounters.

Occasionally, resisiting might mean being destroyed, and so he adapts to the circumstances. He accepts without complaint that the stones along the path hinder his way across the mountains.

Therein lies the strength of water: it cannot be shattered by a hammer or wounded by a knife. The strongest sword in the world cannot scar its surface.

The waters of a river adapt themselves to whatever route proves possible, but the river never forgets its one objective: the sea.
SO fragile at its source, it gradually gathers the strength of the other rivers it encounters.

And, after a certain point, its power is absolute.

Paulo Coelho

PS:  Tada! They are here! 😀 Joy of the Day despite of the many uncertainties and confusions I had to face today. And the good news is I have 3 books to giveaway!


The Killers – Mr. Brightside (Jacques lu Cont’s Thin White Duke mix) from loutsos on Vimeo.


Confession I:

AWWWWW! I fell in love with Jack Johnson all over again!! Heads over Heels!!
Now, you will marry me pretty please?
and Ben Harper? 🙂

Look at all those fancy clothes,
But these could keep us warm just like those.
And what about your soul? Is it cold?
Is it straight from the mold, and ready to be sold?

And cars and phones and diamond rings,
Bling, bling, because those are only removable things.
And what about your mind? Does it shine?
Are there things that concern you, more than your time?

Gone, going.
Gone, everything.
Gone, give a damn.
Gone, be the birds, when they don’t wanna sing.
Gone, people, all awkward with their things,

Look at you, out to make a deal.
You try to be appealing, but you lose your appeal.
And what about those shoes you’re in today?
They’ll do no good, on the bridges you burnt along the way.

And you’re willing to sell, anything?
Gone, with your head.
Leave your footprints,
And we’ll shame them with our words.
Gone, people, all careless and consumed, gone

Gone, going,
Gone, everything.
Gone, give a damn.
Gone, be the birds, if they don’t wanna sing.
Gone, people, all awkward with their things, Gone.

Part I : Kids & Samaritan

‘5 Years Time’ by Noah And The Whale – Moving Type from Paula Castro on Vimeo.

Oh well in five years time we could be walking round a zoo
With the sun shining down over me and you
And there’ll be love in the bodies of the elephants too
And I’ll put my hands over your eyes, but you’ll peep through

And there’ll be sun sun sun
All over our bodies
And sun sun sun
All down our necks
And sun sun sun
All over our faces
And sun sun sun

So what the heck

Cos I’ll be laughing at all your silly little jokes
And we’ll be laughing about how we used to smoke
All those stupid little cigarettes
And drink stupid wine
Cos it’s what we needed to have a good time

And it was fun fun fun
When we were drinking
It was fun fun fun
When we were drunk
And it was fun fun fun
When we were laughing
It was fun fun fun
Oh it was fun

Oh well I look at you and say
It’s the happiest that I’ve ever been
And I’ll say I no longer feel I have to be James Dean
And she’ll say
Yah well I feel all pretty happy too
And I’m always pretty happy when I’m just kicking back with you

And it’ll be
Love love love
All through our bodies
And love love love
All through our minds
And it be Love love love
All over her face
And Love love love
All over mine

Although maybe all these moments are just in my head
I’ll be thinking ’bout them as I’m lying in bed
And all that I know that it might never really come true
But in my mind I’m havin’ a pretty good time with you


Five years time
I might not know you
Five years time
We might not speak
In five years time
We might not get along
In five years time
You might just prove me wrong

Oh there’ll be love love love
Wherever you go
There’ll be love love love
Wherever you go

PS: Thank you Sayang!

5 Years Time from Matt Wisniewski on Vimeo.

chin chin & muck muck

This song got me smiling, smiling and smiling, the whole night long.
It defines my feelings right now.
Funny, confused, mysterious, lost, happy, empty.
Thanks to Tim.
I love my housemates!
What will be will be.

Who says

Who says I can’t get stoned
Turn off the lights and the telephone
Me in my house alone
Who says I can’t get stoned

Who says I can’t be free
From all of the things that I used to be
Rewrite my history
Who says I can’t be free

Who says I can’t take time
Meet all the boys in the county line
Wait on fate to send a sign
Who says I can’t take time

Who says I can’t get stoned
Plan a trip to India alone
Doesn’t matter if I even go
Who says I can’t get stoned

PS : i love jm


yea ich seh nicht wie es besser werden kann
wenn ein kind hier schon allein für sein handy durch ein messer sterben kann
mach es besser, wer es kann, man ich check es nicht
die die dazu in der lage sind verstecken sich
und dem rest gehts so schlecht wie das wetter ist
der frust wächst
opfer du guckst jetzt besser nicht
arme umkreisen kälte und hunger
und für viele die ihrn job aufgeben müssen geht die welt damit unter
wir wollen mensch sein viele sind noch welten darunter
aber wenn wir helfen dann geschehen seltene wunder
lass uns gehn wir ham noch viele schritte zu machen
mach die ersten beiden um danach den dritten zu machen
ich mein es ernst

wir träumen auch von wohlstand und frieden am block
aber die wahrheit ist: niemand ist zufrieden am block
mentalität ist:”scheiß auf alle” weil es euch nicht interessiert
im endefekt sind hier noch nichtmal deutsche integriert
check mal alles kann besser werden
hätten wir nur etwas mehr an echten werten
wir könnten lern wie man durch ergänzung wächst
und vom gefühl wär jeder tag wie die WM 06
das problem mit dem denken, der glaube früher war es besser
früher war der führer alter früher wars nicht besser
deshalb schau nach vorn und lass den alten scheiß zurück
wir gehen ein schritt nach vorn aber zwei zurück
bisher ein schritt nach vorn aber zwei zurück
ab heute ein schritt zwei schritt drei zum glück
los gehts

alles kann besser werden
wir holen uns den himmel auf erden
alles soll besser werden
holn wir uns den himmel auf erden
und alles wird besser werden
wir holen uns den himmel auf erden
keiner muss sein leben mehr gefährden
einer der kostbarsten schätze auf erden
ich will raus aus dieser scheiße hier
doch ich weiß nicht wie das gehn soll
raus aus diesem scheiß revier
doch ich weiß nicht wie es gehn soll
man sperrt mich hier in diesen bezirk
weil ich den rest der welt nicht sehn soll
ich werd aus diesem knast herausspaziern
wenn ich weiß wohin ich gehn soll
alles kann besser werden
wir holen uns den himmel auf erden
keiner muss sein leben mehr gefährden
einer der kostbarsten schätze auf erden (+kinderchor)

xavier naidoo + kinderchor:
alles kann ebsser werden
wir holen uns den himmel auf erden
alles soll besser werden
holn wir uns den himmel auf erden
alles wird besser werden
wir holen uns den himmel auf erden
keiner muss sein leben mehr gefährden
einer der kostbarsen schätze auf erden

megaloh + kinderchor:

ein schritt nach vorn aber zwei zurück
wir gehn ein schritt nach vorn aber zwei zurück
bisher ein schritt nach vorn aber zwei zurück
ab heute ein schritt zwei schritt drei zum glück
(los gehts)


ein schritt nach vorn aber zwei zurück
ein schritt zwei schritt drei zum glück.

Long Live Peterpan

Smile tho’ your heart is aching,

Even though it’s breaking,
When there are clouds in the sky- You’ll get by,

If you
Smile through your fear and sorrow,
Smile and maybe tomorrow

You’ll see the sun come shining through- For you.
Light up your face with gladness,
Hide ev’ry trace of sadness,
Altho’ a tear may be ever so near,
That’s the time you must keep on trying,

Smile- What’s the use of crying,
You’ll find that life is still worthwhile,
If you just smile.


I have a lot in mind but…

Okay, to begin with, I bloody sprained my ankle again, same ankle. Damn, I guess my body mass is just too great, couldn’t even balance myself while going down the stairs, like a humpty dumpty. Crap, thank God I’m not on crutches this time.


On Thursday night, I came to a wrong decision on informing my parents that I’m going out to a musical event. Well, at first I thought that my parents should be aware of my whereabouts and telling them was just being honest. Alright, it was a last minute arrangement and planning; I wasn’t asking for permission but notifying them instead. Unlike the previous outings, I would let them know in advance. Sometimes, telling a white lie is indeed a better option.

While I was enjoying myself and drown into the music, deep inside me, I knew that my parents were worrying.

There are no exceptional, all parents behave the same way. Their children are forever children in their mind.

I was at Laundrybar with another six friends, alright two new friends. Heck, it was for Furniture I went there. One of my favorite local bands thanks to Kohilan. There were three bands altogether, Lied, Citizen of Ice cream (a pretty catchy name), and Furniture. Knowing the fact that it was held in a bar agitated them more. Gosh, if everything goes well, I’ll be off to Germany next year, are they going to flap around all the time? Maybe, it’s merely me, because of the things that I’ve done couldn’t assure them.


To me, liquor, beer, vodka, wine is a beverage. People drink to go with different occasions for instance, celebrations, weddings, and anniversaries. With or without them don’t cause any significant difference, if it’s available, why not? If I would to fork out money for that, I guess that isn’t my cup of tea.

With family, especially my grandpa, a pint of beer or a glass of wine or anything which contains alcohol at night according to him would put him into deep sleep. It acts as if to enhance blood circulation.

As for me, I still do not know how to appreciate all these beverages. It’s bitter. As for wine, i rather drink Ribena.

However, I would like to give cocktail a shot.

Gin and vodka are by far my favorite. Those which I think have a strong aroma, something akin to perfume.

Now my doubt is, it is necessary to consume alcohol when I’m away from my family?

Of course, it is safe?

I would pretty like to conclude it with what kind of outings and people I’m with.

Clubbing scene is totally out of the picture. Therefore, getting tipsy is definitely not a priority.


A : Drink-lah. You scared ah? You left your two balls at home ah? (The oh-so-common phrase people used to provoke your guts)

B : Aiya, you never drink before, must try. (Why? once tried, would fly is it?)

C : I always drink one. I biasa d. (So? I biasa eat shit, you wanna eat too?)

In this case, there’s no point of taking A, B or C into account. If your choice is no, it’s NO. Is it so important to prove to this bunch of pathetic A, B or C whether or not you hide your balls? If they are your good friends, utterly tragedy, they are the ones who are supposed to respect your decisions and not butting in with these sorts of statements.

I’m conventional though I’m only 18. I like cozy environment with a pleasant ambience and setting, a warm and preferably smoke-free area without blaring loud and heart thumping techno where you have to shout your head off to have a normal conversation. Just sit back and enjoy a drink and chill out. That would be an awesome combination.

As I was tempted to drink to appear gaya-ness among the crowd, I managed to resist the persuasion. It was so not crucial. Whether or not I drink esprit instead of beer is completely my pick. We still can cheer and talk. In fact, I’m not prone to beery breath.

I can ONLY sense and put up with the sexiness of my grandpa’s, dad’s and uncles’ beery breath.

Oh yeah… I’m so into frequency canon’s guitarist or bassist. Uber gaya!

Wish I could play drums all over again.


Shout Outs:


A younger-than-me-two-days-macho-who-owns-a-blog-named-Averdim

You surprised me!!! Seeing my name popped up on my screen in your blog, errrr… amazed!

69 for Brian

77 for me

79 for you

84 for Hau Wei

More days left for us before turning to 19, age is just a matter of figure; we are young at hearts and minds.


Thanks for your effort on you-know-what-i-mean!!!


CUTE? Alright, I know a bit retard!! I will try to polish it!!
I watched the first half, Liverpool won!!! One more reason to celebrate!!!!

Best Wishes to all of you!!!!

I’ll keep you people in my prayers!!!